Emotional Culture…What Are You Feeding Yours?

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When a person is angry, anxious or generally negative, the energy of these negative feelings easily spills over into that person’s interactions with others. Families, workplaces—all systems—are vulnerable to this, leading to the creation of emotional norms. Note also, that both verbal and non-verbal behaviors will reinforce these norms, be they negative or positive.

You could say that based on shared emotions, a system develops its own “organizational culture of emotions.” This culture, as mentioned, can be negative and toxic or positive and growth oriented. Sad to say, most of the time, people are not even aware of the emotional culture they are creating.

Leadership is critical in this process. When leadership is negative, a negative tone can permeate the whole system. Positive leadership and positive emotions, in contrast, tend to create and maintain the positive tone of a group and its members.

One study looks at a hospital experiencing subpar performance and low morale. The implementation of a 5-star hotel concept at this hospital demonstrated how a change in emotional culture can change the entire system and environment for the better.

Management instructed all hospital employees to follow the “10-5 rule.” This simple rule directed them to make eye contact and smile if they walked within 10 feet of someone. If they were within 5 feet, they were told to say hello. The result was abundant smiling and positivity in the waiting room and the hallways.

The effect on the hospital was positive and amazing. Employee performance showed noticeable improvement. Patients began to refer new patients to the hospital. Many employees, who had opportunities to go to jobs that paid better, chose to remain at this hospital.

So, what’s the takeaway? Research shows that the expression of positive energy can bring positive results to both individuals and the environment. Employees became more engaged, motivated and positive and the whole hospital environment shifted.

How are you directing your energy? You might consider using the Choice-Cube 4 Key Steps and Tools to manage your energy in a positive way. 

Are You Conscious Of Your Subconscious?

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What improves our personal health, relationships, happiness, wellbeing, and life in general? Progress made in neuroscience has allowed researchers to ask more complex questions and find more complex answers. 

Today as researchers address these fundamental questions, one important one is: What happens in our brain when we shift the focus of our attention?

Certainly, the focus of our thoughts affects the firing and wiring of brain cells--neurons.  But it is not thoughts, in and of themselves alone, that fire and wire neurons.

Truly, what makes our thoughts so powerful is that they cause direct changes to our emotional states.

Perception filters--the meanings we attach.   Cells within our body respond to our thoughts, specifically interpretive thoughts, i.e. the kind that explain to our subconscious mind how we see the world at a given point in time.

Let's say you encounter a lion… when this happens you automatically go into survival mode… unless you are a lion tamer. In this case, unlike most people, you will have completely different beliefs about how to relate to a lion.

Based on your past experiences and the meanings you attach to the lion, you will be able to interact with the animal without activating your survival mode. Your beliefs will let your body and mind remain calm--in the brain's "learning mode."

Interpretive thoughts are beliefs. These thoughts or beliefs act as perception filters in your subconscious mind. They influence activation of certain processes within you as well as management of all your body's systems. Your perceptions offer all the information your subconscious needs to operate and do the following:

- Guarantee your basic survival.
- Remind you of the emotional drives that connect you in a meaningful way to life.

The "judge" and the "robot"   Now, here are two key points. First, your conscious mind is like a judge and your subconscious mind is like a robot. The judge can rule over your subconscious mind... that is as long as you stay aware and mindful.

Your subconscious, a genius at multi-tasking, is designed to process huge amounts of information every second, while your conscious mind processes a much smaller amount at any given time. Therefore unless you know how to stay conscious of your subconscious, whenever you are distracted or overwhelmed, your subconscious will override your conscious mind and run your life.

Jack can stay out of bars as long as he makes a conscious effort to do so. But let him get too tired or angry, he automatically heads for the bar where he feels comfortable and happy.

Second, believe it or not, your subconscious cannot tell the difference between what is real and what is not real. So what you believe to be true becomes the truth for you. And you will express it in your body, emotions, mind, and behavior.

Annie is a beautiful girl, but she grew up thinking she was a "plain Jane," She automatically dismisses complements and slouches around feeling ugly and unwanted.

Here's how it works:

- You have an experience.

- You automatically attach meanings--perception filters--to the people, things, or problems related to that experience.

- These filters produce mind images that trigger emotions and physical sensations in your body.

Experience >> Meaning Attached >> Emotion(s)

It's a tidy little package in which what you focus on causes your subconscious mind to bring up meanings that you attach to a person, thing, or problem. These meanings then set off emotions and physical sensations within your body that release hormones into your blood, affecting the chemical firing of neurons in your brain that lead to the same thoughts, emotions, and behavior and reinforce the whole cycle.

It makes sense to stay conscious of your subconscious. Since your brain is always set to either a negative way of perceiving--a negative perception filter--or to a positive way of perceiving, it's a good idea to become conscious of your subconscious. Awareness gives you some choice.

About the Author

Dr. Beth Cujé, therapist and author of the book, Become the Person You Were Meant to Be, gives you the chance to explore some of these ideas. Look inside the book at Amazon.com or download its first chapter for FREE. Just click here and get an idea of what the Choice-Cube Method can do for you. 

What's At the Center Of Your Life?

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The preacher man was having difficulty explaining how wonderful it is to live with Jesus at the center of his life. He was trying hard, but was not getting through to his congregation.

Finally, he threw up his hands and said, “Before I knew Jesus, I lived in chaos. I either felt nothing or I felt confused. Often, I would just swing back and forth between the two. Living that way was wearing me out!”

What I’m trying to say to you people is that now I live in harmony. My life seems to unfold as a pleasing, consistent whole. Sure, like you, I have good times and bad times. There are constant challenges. But I can always get back to that place of peace and harmony with my Lord. 

I wouldn’t trade this way of life for anything. Nothing! And I believe that anyone who has come to such a place as this, would not be willing to give it up either, not for anything.

You see, living with Jesus, my life has harmony... coherence. I feel stable and safe. I no longer live a life of discord and incoherence. I don't have to feel confused or numb, not really understanding what is going on.  

Thanks be to God, with Jesus at the center of my life, the center holds. Focused on him, no matter what is happening in this world, I’m looking forward to tomorrow, next month, next year. I know God is in control and all things are working together for good. Come join me. The time is short.

Are You Afraid of Life Without Meaning?

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We often deceive ourselves by making up rational--but incorrect-- narratives to explain people, things, actions and problems that trouble us. Why the deception?

Human beings need predictability, consistency: We need to create order. As a result, we will make up stories to give meaning (often incorrect) to people, things, actions, and problems in our efforts to avoid confrontation with meaninglessness--a life without meaning.  

This is why taking full responsibility for what we think, feel, want, and do is a basic concept of the Choice-Cube® Method. A person, thing, action, or problem may indeed trigger certain reactions. However, our reactions are always due to the meaning (correct or otherwise) given to a person, thing, action, or problem. 

Self-deception is often a fight against meaninglessness, and though important for self-understanding, fear of meaninglessness is seldom addressed in psychology. In contrast, creating meaning is of first importance for most philosophies and religions.  

For example, Existential philosophy gave up trying to bring order out of chaos. Paradoxically, they found meaning in accepting “meaningless” as THE structure of reality. The result was that both life and death lost their meaning and direction. Thus for many existentialists, the answer to life and death issues in a  world devoid of meaning was suicide. 

Generally, religion gives a more positive structure and meaning to both life and death. Christianity in particular, gives a positive meaning to both. Christianity suggests that life is a challenge to overcome difficulties and to remain positive in all circumstances. Death in fact, is the “last enemy to be overcome, destroyed, done away with.”  (1 Corinthians 15:26) 

The following scripture from Philippians sums up this perspective quite nicely.  

“Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice…  Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God… And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things… Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content… I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: everywhere and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ, which strengtheneth me… But I have all, and abound: I am full... my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:4-19).

Research shows that this approach to life brings life with it. Those who manage to be genuine overcomers of themselves and life’s problems live longer and with greater joy and purpose.  

What about you? Are you an overcomer finding meaning in your faith? Or are you aware of blockages in your life keeping you stuck, failing to overcome obstacles and struggling with meaninglessness?  You might consider looking at how the 4 Scriptural Steps of the Choice-Cube® Method  help you take responsibility for your reactions, and with the help of the Holy Spirit, find meaning in your daily in the light of God’s Word and will.