Body? Emotions? What Are They Telling Us?

OUR BODY SPEAKS TO US    As a therapist/counselor, more and more I am struck by the importance of the body. A stiff neck can tells us that we slept in an awkward position. In the same way, a body pain may be telling us we have painful emotions that we are failing to deal with, and that something is wrong.

BUT WE DON'T LISTEN     Many of us miss what our body is trying to tell us. We have learned to split off from our body's messages about stress and hurtful emotions. Why? Why would we ignore important messages whether physical or emotional? Because they can hurt! And who wants to have discomfort or pain?

THERE'S A PRICE TO PAY     But we pay a high price for ignoring what our body and emotions try to say to us. Unless we acknowledge that something is wrong, how can we  fix it? 

THIS MIGHT HELP     Of course it helps to have a tried and true way to deal with our feelings, physical or emotional. The simple tools and steps in my book, Become the Person You Were Meant to Be, The Choice-Cube Method: Step by Step to Choice and Change www.amazon.com can help.

                                                                                                                                                               In the book, I discuss the dangers of failing to pay attention to physical and emotional messages. I help you understand how important it is to have choice and make necessary changes. Take a look at the book; it could make a big difference

Doomed To Make The Same Mistake One More Time?

JEN’S STORY.      Jen is plagued with feelings of guilt and regret. She can’t control her rage. Last night, she yelled at her youngest child again because he accidentally spilled his juice on a brand new tablecloth. She hates herself for it now.

She has promised herself over and over that she’ll never do that again. But then another little accident happens, which sends her over the edge. Her son is 5-years-old, for crying out loud! He’s still terribly clumsy, Jen understands that. Now. But she didn’t see it that way last night.

IS SHE DOOMED?      Is Jen doomed to react with rage? Is it simply who she is? Of course, not! She can change!

EASIER SAID THAN DONE.      But it’s easier said than done. What Jen doesn’t understand is that no matter how hard she tries to be more patient with her son she will not succeed unless she changes the beliefs and the inward reactions that cause her angry outbursts.

Her reactions (stress, negative emotions, thoughts and desires) and her angry behaviors result from some painful “unfinished business” and distorted beliefs -- things too painful to bear locked away in her subconscious mind. Only a real conscious effort will enable her to change them.

JEN'S TASK.      Her task is to make what is subconscious conscious. But why? Isn’t it better to just leave these painful things alone? Why bring it all back to the surface?

The answer is that unless we make some things conscious, we are doomed to make the same mistakes over and over. Hopefully, there comes a time when we realize we don’t want to keep making the same mistakes. We want to change.

HOW DO WE MAKE SOMETHING CONSCIOUS?      But how do we make something conscious? I suggest that we start with staying aware of our body sensations and emotions. Usually, when dealing with the subconscious, our mind is not our friend! It just gets in the way. Our mind may be telling us things are okay, but our body--our gut--is saying, “Watch out!”

At moment like this, our conscious mind is not what we should be paying attention to. If we are wise, we will learn to pay attention to signals from our subconscious that surface as our inward reactions--the reactions of  of our body (stress), negative emotions, mind/mental pictures, and  will/desires.

THE FASTEST WAY TO LASTING CHANGE.      The fastest way to lasting change is through changing our inward reactions. Remember, these are the reactions of our body, emotions, mind, and will/desires. Once we know what to look for and can identify our reactions, we can begin to change them. And, good news! If we learn to work with our inward reactions, we can retrain ourselves to stop repeating the same mistakes. Even better, when we know how to change our inward reactions, we can change our deep beliefs and choose our behaviors. We can actually rewire our brain.

In my book, Become the Person You Were Meant to Be - The Choice-Cube Method, you will find, among other things, tools and 4 steps to help you recognize, and work through, your inward reactions and deep beliefs. Click here to see inside the book http://amzn.to/Ug268G. You can retrain yourself, change and grow, and engage life more fully. Also, click here http://www.choicecube.com to check out my website and learn about the method.  Copyright Dr. Beth Blevins Cujé 2011